Best game I have played in a long time. There, I said it. You can stop reading, that’s all you need to know.

If you did stop reading it would save me an awful lot of time, but I can tell you need some convincing. You’ve read the reviews, and aren’t totally convinced because they are all gushing about graphics and Indiana Jones and Tomb Raider. I wish this could have been a review you read before the others, but unfortunately we aren’t paid to do these reviews and I have to go out and either rent or buy the game in order to do them. Once enough people read them though, hopefully Naughty Dog will send me an advance copy with a plush toy thanking me for my time. Read more

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Do you like old-school shoot-em ups?Do you like old-school shoot-em ups, but are ready for a variation on the idea?Do you like old-school shoot-em ups and art games, and are looking for a combination of the two?Do you like old-school shoot-em ups, art games, and minimalist guitar music, and are looking for a combination of all three?.. Read more

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I like this question and answer thing…so lets keep it going.

Ask yourself:

Did you enjoy the Devil May Cry series but thought, this is too easy and why isn’t there more emphasis on blocking attacks and countering?

Do you enjoy a steep learning curve to a complex battle system, which must be practiced and learned to fully appreciate the game?

Do you enjoy rendered backgrounds that hearken back to xbox graphics?

Do superb fluid character animations interest you and beautifully rendered character models?

Has team ninjas patented boob bouncing technology lured you into buying other games?

Are you prepared to have the crap beaten out of you every time you make a mistake, to be brutalized into submission by brutal bosses and to repeat sections of the game over and over if you aren’t a ninja master?

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Is Heavenly Sword worth picking up? Well ask yourself…

Do you enjoy gorgeous graphics?

Did you think God of War was great but a female heroin and simpler puzzles would have made it even better?

Do you enjoy a slightly weak story that is presented with movie like quality?

Do you enjoy paying $69.99 for 6.5 hours of fun and little to no replay value?

Do you think it would be swell to mix up the action with some shooter missions that use six axis control?

If you answered yes to these questions, go buy Heavenly Sword now! But consider this…

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